I did something really harmful today!
I ate a waffle with chocolate and drank iced horlicks!
Time to stop munching and drinking harmful stuff..

*Sighs*
My mum doesn't really understand me..
So does my family..
They thought that it was easy accepting people's critique..
Or rather "constructive comment"..
They thought that it was easy for one to stand in front of 5,6,7 or even 8,
And get shot down by every single one of them verbally..
They thought that it was easy for me to face it all..
I felt my life being taken away every single second..
My mum said that if I couldn't control my emotions..
She would not allow me to continue in my relationship..
Is this my life?
She never allowed me to cry in the past no matter how hard she hit me..
She never allowed me to cry when she scolded..
I'm really scared that someday I'll go crazy..
I'm scared for that day to come..
She said that before I express my emotions..
I have try to control them..
If I feel really sad..
I have to try and suppress that feeling..

But why?
Why can't I express anything I want?
Why can't you understand how I feel?

Perhaps I'm just an overly negative person..
Do not deserve to be loved..
Do not deserve to be cared..
Do not deserve to express my feelings..
Do not deserve to live the life I want..

I DO NOT DESERVE ANYTHING!